What Not to Wear to the Cedarcrest Prom

This blog post is based on my sermon from March 24, 2019.

(thank you to Sue Kravits for the meme)

Then Jesus said to him, "Someone gave a great dinner and invited many. At the time for the dinner he sent his slave to say to those who had been invited, 'Come; for everything is ready now.' But they all alike began to make excuses. The first said to him, 'I have bought a piece of land, and I must go out and see it; please accept my regrets.' Another said, 'I have bought five yokes of oxen, and I am going to try them out; please accept my regrets.' Another said, 'I have just been married, and therefore I cannot come.' So the slave returned and reported this to his master. Then the owner of the house became angry and said to his slave, 'Go out at once into the streets ad lanes of the town and bring in the poor, the crippled, the blind, and the lame.' And the slave said, 'Sir, what you have ordered has been done, and there is still room.' Then the master said to the slave, 'Go out into the roads and lanes, and compel people to come in, so that my house may be filled. For I tell you, none of those who were invited will taste my dinner.'"

--Luke 14:16-24

Once more Jesus spoke to them in parables, saying: "The kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who gave a wedding banquet for his son. He sent his slaves to call those who had been invited to the wedding banquet, but they would not come. Again, he sent other slaves, saying, 'Tell those who have been invited: Look, I have prepared my dinner, my oxen and my fat calves have been slaughtered, and everything is ready; come to the wedding banquet.' But they made light of it and went away, one to his farm, another to his business, while the rest seized his slaves, mistreated them, and killed them. The king was enraged. He sent his troops, destroyed those murderers, and burned their city. Then he said to his slaves, 'The wedding is ready, but those invited were not worthy. Go therefore into the main streets, and invite everyone you find to the wedding banquet.' Those slaves went out into the streets and gathered all whom they found, both good and bad; so, the wedding hall was filled with guests. But when the king came in to see the guests, he noticed a man there who was not wearing a wedding robe, and he said to him, 'Friend, how did you get in here without a wedding robe?' And he was speechless. Then the king said to the attendants, 'Bind him hand and foot, and throw him into the outer darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.' For many are called, but few are chosen."

--Matthew 22:1-14

Now that's a very different version of the parable from the one that we heard in Luke!

In Luke's version, someone gives a great dinner, but all the invited guests have excuses for why they can't come. The house owner then tells his servant to go out into the streets and lanes of the town and bring in the poor, the crippled, the blind, and the lame. The servant reports back that what the house owner had ordered was done and that there is still more room at the banquet. So the house owner told him to go out into the roads and lanes and compel people to come, so that the house would be full. Finally, the house owner, with a seemingly surly reply, declares that none of the original invited guests will taste the dinner. That's Luke's version of the parable.

Parable of the Great Supper, illustrated by Harold Copping (1863-1932)

"Go out into the roads and lanes, and compel people to come!"

In Matthew's version of the parable people actually die! A king gives a wedding banquet for his sons. When the king's slaves go out to spread the word, some of them are mistreated and killed. Then the king sends his troops to destroy the murderers and burn their city. Somehow a spurned banquet invitation leads to all-out war. I prefer Luke's version of the parable, where the house owner simply says to the no-shows, "Well, no dinner for you!"

I'm troubled by the gratuitous violence in Matthew's parable, but I don't believe that Matthew is advocating violence. The last thing we need is for a parable to advocate violence, particularly after what happened a little over a week ago in Christchurch, New Zealand! We do NOT need a religious text that seemingly advocates violence in the name of religion!

Instead of advocating violence, I believe that the Gospel writer Matthew was most likely reporting violence that had already happened. Most scholars believe that Matthew was writing to Christians who lived in Syria between the years 80 and 90 of the Common Era. To them the reference to the destroyed city would have evoked memories of the destruction of Jerusalem in the year 70. The earlier mistreatment and murder of the slaves would have been heard as a reference to Israel's rejection of the prophets. And the members of Matthew's church would have recognized themselves as the last-minute replacement guests assembled in the great wedding hall (insights from Thomas G. Long, Matthew, Westminster Bible Companion Series, pp. 246-247).

If we put ourselves in the place of these last-minute replacement guests, then the parable, far from advocating violence, becomes a motivational lesson about living faithfully, even in times of violence and persecution.

Because of the times in which we live, there is an urgency about our faith. There is a compelling motivation to take our faith seriously enough to dress the part!

Look at the interaction in the parable between the king and someone who failed to dress the part.

When the king notices that one guest in particular is not wearing a wedding robe, the king says, "Friend, how did you get in here without a wedding robe?"

This is another difference between Luke and Matthew. In the Gospel of Luke, the word "friend" has a positive connotation, but in the Gospel of Matthew it has a negative connotation and really means something more like "buster" (see Long, p. 247). Thus, the king is saying, in essence, "Hey, buster, where's your tux?" The guest is speechless, and the king orders him to be thrown into the outer darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth, which is an ancient Jewish way of saying that his life will unfold in endless tragedy.

Endless tragedy? Simply for forgetting to wear a tux? Why does Jesus make such a big to-do about wearing the proper attire?

If we were to survey the full scope of the Bible, we would notice an interesting preoccupation with with what we wear. In the words of one preacher, the Bible begins with God dressing Adam and Eve in the Garden, and it ends with the saints being given white robes to wear in the New Jerusalem. In between there is Paul's reminder to the Galatians that "as many of you as were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ." Likewise, the Christians in Colossae, in a passage that is often quoted at weddings, are told to clothe themselves with "compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience" (insight from Bob Dunham, in a sermon preached at University Presbyterian Church, Chapel Hill, North Carolina, October 9, 2011).

Thus, it shouldn't be surprising that the Gospel writer Matthew also has a keen interest in what we wear. In our parable, the wedding robe itself represents the Christian life. In the words of preacher and scholar Tom Long, the parable reminds us with urgency that being a part of the Christian community should make a discernible difference in who we are and how we live . . .

There should be a sense of awe and responsiveness about . . . belonging to the community of Christ . . . Sure, the spotlighted guest in the parable was [whisked away] from the street unexpectedly and was probably wearing cutoffs and [sneakers], but, when he got inside, only a fool would fail to see the difference between what he wore and where he was. He was in the banquet hall of the king; he was at the wedding feast of the royal son . . . He is the recipient of massive grace. Where is his awe? Where is his wonder? Where is his regard for generosity? [The other guests have quietly traded] their street clothes for the garments of worship and celebration, but there he is bellying up to the punch bowl, stuffing his mouth with fig preserves, and wiping his hands on his T-shirt. When the host demands to know where his wedding garment is, the man is speechless, and well he should be. In his self-absorption, he [hadn't fully realized] until that very moment that he was at a wedding banquet at all! Just so, to come into the church in response to the gracious and unmerited invitation of Christ and then not conform one's life to that mercy is to demonstrate a spiritual narcissism so profound that one cannot tell the difference between the wedding feast of the Lamb of God and happy hour in a bus station bar (Long, pp. 247-248).

Many commentators have suggested that a guest at an ancient Mediterranean wedding would have been provided with a robe to wear, which perhaps explain the rage of the king upon discovering that this man had casually tossed his wedding robe onto a bar stool while taking advantage of the free booze.

For me, I'll admit that it makes the ending of the parable easier to swallow if the wayward guest had been given a robe to wear and then simply refused to wear it.

But part of me wonders that even if he hadn't been provided with a robe, wouldn't his awe and gratitude at being invited to the royal wedding have bee enough to motivate him to procure a robe? Wouldn't his thankfulness have been enough to spur him to new levels of ingenuity and creativity?

For most of my ministry, I have preached a gospel of gracious inclusion. All people are invited to the feast. God loves and cares for each one of us. In response the church is called to go out into the streets and invite still more people to come, because there is plenty of room in the banquet hall. And for those of you who need to hear that message this morning, I pray that is the message you will hear.

But for those of us who have heard that message, for those of us who have responded to the invitation and find ourselves assembled in the great wedding hall, there is another message--namely, that if we truly comprehend what a marvelous thing it is to be included in the family of God, then it will motivate us to take our faith seriously enough to dress the part!

The gospel message is "come as you are" not "come as you were." Grace is free, but it isn't cheap.

We have all been invited to the $500,000 per plate dinner that we could have never afforded on our own. The creative challenge before us is to figure out how to dress. Even if the tuxes and gowns are not passed out as we walk through the door, surely we have enough ingenuity to figure out how to dress to the nines anyway.

Surely, we have enough awe and gratitude to help each other grow in our generosity, to help each other grow in our spiritual disciplines. And in the midst of the violence in our world, it is all the more crucial that we dress the part, that we look and sound like peacemakers and seekers of justice.

In Keene, New Hampshire, there is a facility named Cedarcrest that provides round-the-clock treatment for children with severe mental and developmental disabilities. Most families are too overwhelmed to provide that level of twenty-four hour care at home.

One Saturday I was making a pastoral visit to Cedarcrest with a family from the congregation I once served in Vermont, and I noticed that all along the walls of the front hallway were pictures of the Cedarcrest children in evening gowns and tuxedos.

One 12-year-old boy had a jacket and tails draped over the back of his highly specialized wheelchair.

Another photo showed a toddler wearing an absolutely stunning sequined dress.

I asked one of the staff members about the photographs, and she told me that they were photos from the Cedarcrest Prom. I remarked how the staff must have spent hours and hours custom fitting the formal wear and painstakingly dressing each child, not to mention all the other preparations for the prom.

And she smiled and nodded her head in a way that indicated that all of those hours of work had been a labor of love.

If you are ever invited to the Cedarcrest Prom, you wouldn't dare show up in a T-shirt and jeans!